Hey guys! I know I haven't blogged since summer started but I really wanted to do a post on something I feel strongly about. I'll try to get back on blogging reguarly when I go back to school in mid August!
Anyway, the post I want to do is on something I've seen as a growing issue in the disability community of America. Often when people who are able bodied see a disabled person doing what they do they feel inclined to go up to them and congratulate them on accomplishing a normal task. Most able bodied people think that they are being nice by complimenting their disabled counterpart on whatever they're doing and I'm sure they have good intentions but these compliments draw attention to the disabled person and often that attention is unwanted.
I have had many people approach me in this way throughout twenty years of personhood and by now it's just annoying. Like I said earlier I'm sure people have good intentions when they compliment me or any disabled individual if they do something people see as "normal" i.e. activities done by mostly able bodied people.
"You do so well" or "Good job!" seem harmless but believe me when I say that most disabled individuals do not want to be called out- even if it's in a good way. We want to fit in just like any person would and acknowledging that we do normal things DESPITE a disability actually has the opposite affect. It singles us out and frustrates us.
Now I'm not saying compliments are bad, but all I'm saying is that able bodied people who want to give the disabled people that live among them most of us just want you to think about your compliment and how you deliver it will be perceived by the complimentee. Like some people tell me, "Wow! You do so well with normal things despite having less motor function than most people!" and that will usually get a nice response from me in front of the complimenter but anger me in my mind and frustrate me. Why don't we compliment everyone on doing something; why do we single out drawing attention to the disabled?
Is it because we try harder to live a normal life? Are people truly inspired by that? I don't think they should be. We're just like you trying to live our lives as normally as possible.
